Ringing Mum, to wish her Happy Mother’s Day I found her pensive and a little teary. What’s wrong? “I just received a lovely present from your brother, included in the parcel was a book on a perfect mother. It’s just too hard no one could be as perfect and lovely as that, it made me cry. Besides he shouldn’t have spent so much money on me he really can’t afford it.” Mum we both know he is a very generous soul and money has very little meaning to him.How lovely he acknowledged you and your mothering/nurture.
How can we live up to the role of being the perfect mother ?
Each society /culture and family has an unconscious expectation of a mother. This archetypal role is deep within our psyche placed thereby by religion, think of the Mother Mary. History, think of Aphrodite, Cleopatra was a mother and all of these images mingle deep within us.
Unless we get to know all of the selves that live within us, recognising that we can never live up to these images, we will be bound to repeat an eternal sense of falling short of the internal image-failure. Finding a place far from preconceptions, will allow us to shed the skins of others ideas on how we should mother. Unless we get to know our greater Self.
My mother’s approach to her inner self is by attending church and prayer, mine is to work with meditation.
Clarissa Pinkola Estes Talks of contacting the power of the Wild Woman using the archetypal stories that are deep in societies thought pattern. Her book Women who run with the Wolves. uses familiar childhood stories,e.g. The red shoes, Bluebeard, to re-acquaint us with our inner mother or inner knowing. She introduces the wild or wolf woman
“Healthy wolves and healthy women share certain psychic characteristics: Keen sensing, playful spirit, and a heightened capacity for devotion. Wolves and women are relational by nature, inquiring, possessed of great endurance and strength. They are deeply intuitive, intensely concerned with the young, their mates and their pack. They are experienced in adapting to constantly changing circumstances; they’re fiercely stalwart and very brave.’’
This wild woman comes under many names in many guises and is truly ancient. Kundalini she who is coiled at the base of our spine, she will rise when the environment is right.
Ms. Estes says “Durga controls the skies and the winds and the thoughts of humans from which all reality spreads; Coatlique gives birth to the infant universe which is Rascally and hard to control, but like a wolf mother, she bites her child,s ear to contain it. Hecate the old seer “who knows her people” and has about her the smell of humus and the breath of God.
At La Loba’s place, (wolf)the physical body is, as Poet Tony Moffeit writes, “a luminous animal,” and the bodies immune system seems to be strengthened or weakened by conscious thought.’’
“In mythos and by whatever name, La Loba knows the personal past and the ancient past for she has survived generation after generation, and is old beyond time. She is an archivist of feminine intention. Her whiskers sense the future; she has the far-seeing milky eye of the old crone; she is backwards and forward in time simultaneously, correcting for one side by dancing with the other.
La Loba the old one, The One Who Knows, is within us She thrives in the deepest soul psyche of women. The ancient and vital Wild Woman. The La Loba story describes her home as that place in time where the spirit of women and the spirit of Wolf meet-the place where her mind and her instincts mingle, Where a woman’s deep life funds her mundane life. It is the point where the I and the Thou kiss, the place where women run with the wolves.’’
Each woman has potential access to Rio Abajo Rio this river beneath the river. She arrives there through deep meditation, dance, writing, painting, pray making, singing, drumming, active imagination, or any activity which requires an intense altered consciousness A woman arrives in this world- between- worlds through yearning and by seeking something she can just see out of the corner of her eye. She arrives there by deeply creative acts through intentional solitude, and by practice of any of the arts. And even with these well crafted practices, much of what occurs in this ineffable world remains for ever mysterious to us, for it breaks physical laws and rational laws as we know them.”
There is speculation that the immune system of the body is rooted in this mysterious psychic land, and also the mystical, as well as all archetypal title images and urges including our God- hunger, our yearning for the mysteries, and all the sacred instincts as well as those which are mundane.”
Indeed first we must meet the women within who mother us.